Those bitches are out to get me

Is it just me or is this affecting the entire population in Singapore?

I'm under the attack of mosquitoes!

I mean I respect them, after all they've been around for 30 million years but what have I done to irritate them? Several times a year, I get these attacks, especially when I'm asleep. I wake up in the middle of the night because the itch is overbearing, and I scratch away like a mad woman. Then I slather aloe vera gel all over myself just so the itch would stop. Then I'd wake up the next day to see red, angry wheals all over my legs and arms. When that subsides, a tiny, ugly red bump remains, and it won't go away until a few weeks later. No, these are not normal mosquito bites. I used to have nice flawless legs. Now they're spotted with tiny, red bumps.

How else has my life changed since these gnats start to attack me? The pest control (I call them pesky) guys come down once a week to fumigate the entire area here. So for certain hours on Monday, I'd suffogate on the terrible gas. And remember that you have to close all doors and windows when they're fumigating the area, because the mozzies have evolved over time (hey, they've been around for a long time) and developed brains...

I've taken to closing my windows at night when I sleep. My mum was the one who alerted me to this : I once looked out of my window at night to see if those staying upstairs and downstairs have their windows open. I was the only silly one! And guess where all the mosquitoes would fly into? We know how prolific those bitches can be at night, and we're sleeping like dead logs, why make the job easier for them! So it's been a long time since I've smelt nice, cool air at night. I've also developed the habit of wrapping myself with my duvet - even on hot, humid nights just to deter them. Poor me! My mum has also spent more than $100 buying aloe vera gels because they ease the itch so well.

Why can't the females just feed on plant nectar like all their males do? What's so tasty about blood anyway? Maybe mine's sweeter than the average human but really, all that protein will kill you. Look at what happened to the Atkin's diet?